Utilitarian

Expand! 18 x 24 pastels

I am a plow. Not something (someone) to be put on a pedestal, shined up and cherished. I am to serve when dirt needs to be broken up, to get close to the grit and grime and pushed over. I am to be placed in an old barn, or if rain comes while I'm working, to be left where I am until I can be used again. The attention I receive is when I'm dull (witted) and need to be sharpened for additional use. If allowed to sit long, I get a coat of rust, that may or may not cause problems for you later. But typically, I'm left on the sidelines, until someone needs work done.

I serve my purpose. I am a tool to be used. There are those, whose very design facilitates their participation in the spotlight! They are shined and polished, covered with chrome and meant to be fondled with loving hands. There are those who are made more glorious by adding illumination from within, so their "inner glow" is that much more evident. That's not me; I am base and simple.

Get to It

I tried to fight it, I tried to resist, but it's in my bones and in my heart; Get to It, Eddie! These days, my life is less "pulled in many directions" and more pairing down the list of warring factions! I get to paint - if I get up early enough - and write as much as time permits. I take a mid-day break to walk and see my beautiful city. Work is demanding, but I'm surrounded by people who are certain, capable and helpful.

But there is an urgency to my life; there is an undercurrent that says there's more to my life than taking occasional breaks, painting "pretty pictures" and providing for the family. There are times when I feel that "unfinished work," that nagging sense that I've got far more to do! Quite honestly, while I was certain "art" would provide a sense of destiny and a feeling that I've arrived, so far, it's only intensified that sense that there is more discovery and revealing to come.

Urgent, insistent...maybe it's self-discovery, maybe it's a deeper relationship with God and maybe both. All I know is, I'm not done yet!

Thought for The Day - Do it for...

Detail of "Linen - A Storm's Coming" 

You know, there are as many ways to approach this daily practice as there are thoughts in my head. There are equally as many reasons to stop doing it as there are to continue. So I choose to do it. I don't want the reason to stop writing to be I don't have "enough" readers. I don't want the reason to be someone said something insulting or demeaning. The choice to stop has to be significant and that I am making a choice for better. Whatever that is.

You know, I can sit in front of this computer daily, walk the streets of downtown Chicago, or while I'm sweating out my catharsis in the gym, a thousand ideas, thoughts and messages hit me. I can do this writing, journaling and blogging all day. I could start conversations through this outlet that continue into the night, but...

I do it for those who are considering blogging but wonder if they have the right stuff

I do it for the person who reads for a bit of encouragement in general

I do it for my own need to express

I do it as an outlet for my thoughts and emotions

I do it because I don't sing :)

I do it because in a given day, ways to impact the world are limited and everyone needs to express

Thought for The Day - "I"

I'm Listening 24 x 36 Oil

Yes
I am here
This place where you sit
Quietly
Pouring out your soul
Clamoring for answers

I am Here
Here
Here
Where your eye is
And where it cannot go
I hear each syllable
And the intent of your heart

In the light of day
You look for me
In the faces
The movement of people
And the noise of the day
Oh I am there
But your vision is clouded
Looking for an expression
Perfection in skin and tone

In the darkness
When you sleep
I am
The movements unseen
The silence of a morning
Not quite yet born
I sit perched
And quick as a dart
I am here
Over there
And back here again

Between the hearts of two
And the heartbeat of one
I speak
Between the "whoosh"
And the "thump"
In the silence
Like a gap between notes

In the fruit
at the core
where the seed lies
waiting
I wait
In the ground, will I go
Or disappear in the trash
So much more than the question
And greater than destiny

I am the journey
The answer
I am the question you ask repeatedly
And would never move your mind to form
I am the night
And the noon day
The particular love you cannot have
And the mystery of the Shroud of Turin
Am I you ask
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

You wait for a reply
Because you think you've asked for information
But in your heart
You've asked for interruption
Disruption
A change you control
I am not remote
for your control
I am timeless
And limitless
And just before you breathe your last
I am...

Thought for The Day - What's in There?

A big pot, the lid rattling steam rises from a corner, the contents boil and rumble...

Every now and then, something boils up to the surface...

I write

I paint

And within those two, there is no limit to what can be said! I absorb stories from the expression of people I may never meet, there body language as we pass one another on the street, part of the epic saga. Each passing cloud and the designs on a woman's dress or a man's tie, part of a huge tapestry that covers and surrounds us all.

Each day, with each moment of the day, we are living out the dream. Know your role, play it well...

Thought for The Day - Say It Anyway!

Not the insult

Not the gossip

Not someone else's issues or concerns

The world is crowded with that stuff and quite frankly, that stuff is why we don't say what needs to be said. But say "it," anyway. Say what needs to be said, what is encouraging, what is truthful and what spreads love. Sometimes, the words seem to fall on death ears. It might seem that "no response" is the equivalent of "I'm not listening," but say it anyway.

The world is full of words, to the extent, it is perceived: "words are just words." But words have always and will continue to be a source of power. Carefully chosen words can change the world and words spoken with intention, certainly change hearts and mind.

Write it anyway; when no one responds, when the usual replies and "likes" don't occur, when you wrote with  ____ in mind, but someone else responds, write it anyway. Now it's easy for me to write these things. And quite honestly, given the "right place," they are just as easy to say. But please believe, there are more than a few times I have to "take my own medicine." I am a listener, by nature. My default practice is listening. But it seems, because I listen intently, I am to respond better. Because I hear what you're saying as well as what you aren't, and I listen to God's spirit as He tries to respond, my words contain healing.

You know, there are days when I don't say much; I've used this and other platforms to say what is on my mind. And it can be downright unbearable when I don't get a reply. But I say it, I write it anyway. In this way, words that needed to be said, expectations for this world are expressed and little by little, our perception shifts. We become more and more as the divine manifestation we are intended to be.

Say it anyway.

Thought for The Day - Voice

The culmination of years of hopeful prayers, that few would hear or have a clue about; I am there. There was a time when I wanted to spend my days in front of the television. My mom still finds it surprising that I don't know certain actors and actresses or don't watch "this or that" show. I think television and other media are great sources for information, but I found a better one: the space between my ears.

I find writing and painting to be what I thought entertainment was. When you watch the news, a drama or comedy, you see your life in the characters or tragedies. Well years ago when I begin to journal on a daily basis, while I struggled, I found that I could get my thoughts out and it was one of the most freeing activities I practiced. Admittedly, I knew the process of pouring out my soul would not be complete without images.

Images; my way of making the eyes and hand work together and display what's in my heart. Impressions, the sense of the vibrant life that surrounds us, seen and unseen. The combination of images and words allows me to express my impressions and hopes for this world.

Perhaps you find yourself frustrated with the course of life. Maybe you've longed to express yourself, and more importantly, to be heard. Don't we all want to fit in without becoming part of the background? We all search for significance in this world...try writing, try sketching, acting, comedy, anything that allows you to express what's in you. Don't allow another day to go by without sharing who you are.

Thought for The Day - Maybe You Need Word with Your Pictures?

Phoenix 18 x 24 pastels

Abstract images get a bad rep from the uninformed. Yes I know, calling someone uninformed is the equivalent of using the biblical analogy where Jesus said you shouldn't cast your pearls before swine. People don't hear their "name" called until they perceive an insult. But the "uninformed," those who won't look into the multiple abstract images floating in their head and perceive the message; for those people, an image on a canvas is best represented by faces, torsos and bowls of fruit! To those people, that's art! Expand your mind, friend!

I don't like seeming insulting, but honestly it's just as insulting to be told: "I don't get it!" Or the worse "my five year old niece/nephew/grandchild could do that!" Honestly, they couldn't! Unless they reached into that place where souls are willing to go, first of all. And then they would have to allow that "source" to flow through them. Not many go there; and quite honestly, not many should. Every person has their unique expression and gifts. 

Admittedly, our "message" isn't readily received. I've long thought to add words, maybe a little story to make things clearer. Not sure if I'm getting the desired result, but until I hear differently, I will continue to do so. The image above is one of those images. It's entitled Phoenix and is named after the mythical bird that regenerates itself. But the story is more important how my image came to be.

Sitting down one evening, pastels and a sheet of paper, I started with a simple stroke of green. I've always liked building layers of colors and moving them about the surface. Equally pleasurable is mimicking contour, depth and form. These are objects we see every day: the surface of a car, your arm, a child in motion. With all of that flowing through my mind, but not necessarily the goal, I went at it!

I can't begin to explain the many thoughts going through my head while rendering, I can only tell you about the "middle place." At some point, I begin to make more concrete decisions as opposed to simply flowing. Judgement, correction and intention play into how an image develops. With "Phoenix," at some point I saw there was a wing to the left and this ghost-like, energetic bird in the middle. My sense was this image represented life, or the progression of life. I didn't "intentionally" place an egg in the lower right hand corner, but when I realized it was there, it made perfect sense. The images were coming together as one and as a result you have a representative of life: how it comes to be, how we find ourselves (the bird's wing) and our eventual transition into another. 

Words and Images; not sure where else I can take the idea, but for now, we will leave it at that. 

Thought for The Day - When No One is Looking

A Rhythm of Her Own 18 x 24 pastels

It’s not a matter of who’s watching

When no one is supposed to see you

But who you are

In those unscripted moments

When your mind reflects your thoughts back at you

When you see you as a child

As an adult

And as so much more and

Yet so simple

Pure Human

Carved out of light and matter

Smiling

A private joke

A moment all your own

I’ve seen you in those moments

When no one is looking

A thousand faces and bodies hovering about

No one finds you in that moment

But me

And quite suddenly

And by accident

You aren’t self aware

Or other aware

Just aware of a world no larger than the body you inhabit

All images and expressions are the exclusive property of Eddie L. Hudson. Do not reproduce without permission.

Thought for The Day - My Journey is not Yours

Soul Dance 8 x 11 Colored Pencils

I've never struggled with this; the logic has always made sense to me. "Everyone can't walk in your shoes," that thought has been part of me as far back as I can remember. As a child, I could sit and look at a book for hours! And as I learned to read I could read book after book. My mother put me in tow with cousins when I was about 8 or 9 years old, to go to the library, a good 6 blocks from our apartment. And what was I reading? Books on Black history, slavery and (my childhood hero) Frederick Douglas. Sure I liked playing with the many cousins who lived nearby, but very early on, I figured out, no matter how close they are to you, people choose to take advantage of kindness and tell your secrets. While I won't say that drove me to the "inner world" of reading and art, it contributed to it.

My outlet isn't yours...

I have a great friend, we met years ago as young men, attending a fairly large church nearby. He owned a car detail shop, where he would clean cars by hand. Now the business was located in the parking structure of a major catalog company at the time, and his enclosed garage within it, was in the basement. But it was always his dream - and still is - to have a location on a busy street. He's an outgoing type, a naturally kind, generous and friendly guy. Years ago, we compared personalities when he asked me to render a building design for him. He wanted to sit with me and tell me step-by-step what he wanted the design to look. I told him that isn't my work style; I prefer you tell me what you want, allow me the time to render a few ideas and then present them. He didn't get it; he said he liked for people to watch him "clean their cars" and show him what he was doing wrong. Honestly, I never believed he wanted that, though, in his head at the time, it made perfect sense. Now I could clean my car by hand; Saturday evenings was the time I would clean my wife's and my car, cleaning them inside and out. I would have jazz music  or maybe Gospel music playing from one car while I cleaned the other. But I always preferred that I have that time alone. I really didn't want someone around telling me "you missed a spot," or "you really should use a chamois rather than a terry cloth towel because ______. " No, let me have this time to do my work as I see fit.

I watched my children as they grew up and wondered what their outlets would be. My daughter has a wonderful, caring personality and speaks well in public settings, but that isn't her "thing." My middle son, when he was 3 or 4, could play for hours with Hot Wheel cars, but he always wanted to build cranes and pulley systems - using my weight bench "grrrr!" When he was about 6, he had a list of 'jobs' he wanted to do, but the one that seemed to get the most attention was "I want to be a working man!" Words he would say with force and his hands stretched out like he was holding a bunch of tools in both. While my daughter didn't have an idea what she wanted to do until she went to college, my middle son figured it out by his freshman year in high school. Both are bold and willing to try out different areas. When I ask my youngest what he wants to do - and believe me I've been asking for a long time - now he says "I haven't figured it out yet." Actually, I'm sure I know what he would love to do, but it's hard to agree that you will spend the remainder of your life in a room "playing video games."

I've found multiple ways to express myself and so very often, it doesn't require that I utter a word. But words, images, concepts and viewpoints are intricate to my way of contributing to the world. Final analysis? Be. Create the means by which you will contribute to this world and surely it will fit in the grand scheme of this world.

Thought for The Day - Momentary Value

Linen (in process) 30 x 40 oil

In this case, when I say "momentary," I'm not speaking of temporary or transitional, but those moments when you appreciate something or someone. I don't know about you, but I can be fickle; it's not a matter of not loving or having long lasting appreciation, but it's a matter of having "highs and lows." Behind me, sits a painting titled "Linen," the first in a series (currently working on number two; that will come up for air soon) and certain aspects of the colors and the style of it struck me. I "appreciate" my work, but there are times when I don't "value" my work. I'm thankful for the gift of expression, for the ability to express myself in word and images and so glad I'm back to rendering. But there are times when I take for granted that I'm doing work that is rich and attention worthy.

Believe me, that isn't an easy thing to write. I'm thinking of the reaction of the people who might read it, thinking they will say "that's conceited" or worse "I don't see anything of value." But sometimes you've got to start where you are and appreciate your own work. Now tomorrow, with a little time on my hands, I may look at that same image and see the flaws and consider ways to improve it or what should have done differently. But for now, I appreciate the depth of color and movement - the Momentary Value.

Peace.

Thought for The Day - Blogging Colors

Calling 12 x 18 pastels

What goes out each day are words and images, sentences and colors; shapes and emotions hit the highway and travel from one end to another. I mingle my voice in the blend of voices writing, singing and teaching how to's from every corner where perception reaches.

In in love with colors, I love deep blues as well as night piercing pinks. I love words and expressions, simple and with layers of intent and purpose. These shapes on the page that we have come to call letters, form words, phrases and sentences and the world is full of them. Some would say too many, but the purpose of expression is to heal and build. We have not grown too large that we can't communicate without them, so I keep writing and reaching and applying spiritual bandages.

Years ago, as a young man, I asked God how my life could be of service to him. His simple reply: "accept my call." Words and images are my way of reaching a world and spreading the good news. Are you listening? Are you seeing?

Thought for The Day - Peering into the Void

The Portal (working title...in process) 12 x 18 pastels

Many things can be said and when words are few...

I spent sometime yesterday working on the latest piece; a working title "the portal." As challenging as it is to define, designate a title, it's as difficult or rewarding to stare at the work and be flooded with a hundred variables. Typically, I don't get hours on end to sit and work, never mind actually sit and stare, but whatever I'm permitted, I feel multiple approaches flooding my mind.

That might explain the variable colors and textures...to best capsulize the process, there are colors and shapes and textures, layered upon one another. In my head, it's like a well written story, with plots and sub-plots, twists one never expects and even after the climax, there are subtle side stories continuing to run.

Sitting, staring, looking down a path and watching life unfold...sometimes one concentrates on one spot; other times, the mind tries to process every detail simultaneously.

Thought for The Day - The Root

Where it All Begins...

The process of creating stems from a place and a source deeper than tree roots.

I live in an sub-urban area, but not the idyllic type with large yards, manicured lawns and cookie-cutter homes. It's an older area with large older trees and yards where a child's imagination grows. Some of the older trees have roots that reach deep and spread wide. When we moved into our house 25 years ago (wow, seems like yesterday!) there were remnants of an apple tree that produced a crab apple or two per year. I would say a year or two after we moved in, we had the tree cut down and removed. Have you ever looked at the roots of a tree that's been removed? Let me give you an idea what I'm talking about: that tree has been gone for approximately 20 years and I use the location to plant a vegetable garden. Whether I turn the soil with a shovel or till it with a tiller, I still find roots, old and supposedly dead. Now that tree didn't produce enough fruit to keep around and the few branches growing from it's trunk didn't give me hope for it. Sure, everyone wants a tree in their yard, especially a fruit tree to grab fresh produce, but when it looks bare and sickly, it's got to go!

My mom gave me the impetus to be creative; her simple doodling while on the phone opened a channel for me that 46 years later, still produces 'stuff.' I thought it had died, I thought when I faced the dilemma of 'making money' and 'being an artist' at 21, I would never produce another image again (not really; it was the melodramatic side of me having it's moment). And though, for all practical purposes nothing visual came from me, images and concepts lay beneath the surface, waiting for an outlet. Good as well as bad times stirred the outlets, the cracks and crevices to allow the flow to emerge. And years later, I'm at it again. The source is no more depleted than breathable air. It is nurtured from a source that never runs dry and each day is an opportunity to produce words and images. I am forever grateful for the ability to express!

Thought for The Day - The Depths

Spending a little time this morning, searching through pictures, faces, bodies and souls, the obvious is evident: that we are spiritual beings living in physical bodies. And sometimes - most of the time - the physical becomes the crutch we lean on. We lean on our senses to define what our soul communicates. We listen, see and taste, trying to satisfy the longing of our soul.

Our soul is expressive, a voice, a declaration of what is hidden. We are designed for far more than receiving. Knowledge, imagination and innovation spring from the connection we make with the world and not taming it but living in it. We balance our lives in connection, not domination or repression. Our connections reflect the beauty of our souls. Even those that are difficult - people who are perpetually angry, sad or disagreeable - are in our lives to receive the LOVE we express. But be careful! If you are prone to a victim's mentality, prone to be abused and allow others to drain you, give yourself space from offensive individuals. We live in a world of "givers" and "takers," and it never ceases to amaze me that people don't recognize which role they play!

Be expressive, be free. Be full of life and give more than you take. When there are those around you who give as freely to you as you do to them, life is a wonderful journey! And when you find yourself out of balance, provide distance, contemplate what went wrong and either choose to repair it or move on.

Peace
Be
You

Thought for The Day - Love

After the Dance 18 x 24 charcoal and pastels

Send it out

Receive it

We love "love." We love "loving." But love is more than responding to someone who is "loving;" love, by it's very nature simply gives. It does not stop because it is not received. Love does not fade in the face of opposition. It simply loves.

Think of love like the wind...we build homes and buildings and we build them to withstand strong winds. But wind finds it's way through the smallest cracks. It wraps around the house, envelopes it and in a quiet moment, you can hear it whipping around corners. When a breeze is powerful, you can feel it even in a brick house. That's what love is; we put up barriers to it, we try to prevent it's expression when we reject an individual, but love is stronger than hurt and love is greater than pain. Love. Never. Fails.

Thought for The Day - Chriysalis

Phoenix 18 x 24 pastels

Following the guidance of the Spirit...

We live our lives longing for expression though our society loves to hate our word, dance and colors. The very ones we would bless, instruct us to remain quiet, get a job or "keep the day one." And we learn to put a hard outer shell around our selves. It's effect is felt in our core, down to our soul. And we medicate, anesthetize and shelter our sensitive natures. Men become bullies or silent heroes and women become stern, hard working managers.

And yet, beneath that hard shell, like a small flickering flame, beats a heart and desire that will not die. It finds ways of expressing itself; in aches and pains that appear out of nowhere, memories of dancing and singing without a care surface from time to time. We pay "professionals" or as we have come to call them: celebrities, to perform for us, when we are perfectly capable of singing our own song.

Somehow, we think the world is too small, not realizing how the very ground beneath us and sky above yearns to expand to make room for the power hidden beneath our shells!

Years ago, I buried "Eddie;" tucked him safely behind a shirt and tie...no more!

Thought for The Day - On the Mic

Expectation 24 x 36 Oil painting

That's "mike" or "microphone," for those who may not know. They get on stage with two goals in mind: to entertain and share themselves. Singers, or as they are known around these parts "sangers!" They want you to enjoy them, they aim to please, but they can't please you if they aren't feeling the beat and the message. And when they feel it, either in preparation for the performance or during, WE feel it! Sometimes, the most basic renditions can blow you away!

Recently surfing Facebook's News stream, Lalah Hathaway posted a link to YouTube, where she's performing a song: "Something." Now her vocal skills are seriously off the chart, so everything she sings blows you away, but the video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0SJIgTLe0hc, the energy from start to finish is filled with promise, joyful anticipation and wondrous surprise! Her energy, the energy of the band, the sound technicians, the audience...seriously you could not bottle this!!!

On that mic, on the stage in dance gear, guitar in hand, a canvas, a poem straining to break free from your throat. Where ever your expression finds it's release...SET IT FREE!!!

Thought for The Day - What is it with Singing?

The Phoenix

Some people can't help themselves! They sing all the time, practically incessantly. My sister and her children are that way. And they make nearly everything a song. But they have beautiful voices so it's okay! To be able to take words, a tune or rhythm and put them together in a way that's appealing, how do you do that?

Now as a visual artist, I love seeing objects, people, textures and the like and trying to render it. It's something about the contours and shapes and colors and the whole clashing and blending that sends my soul into another place. I thought about this the other day, how when I was about four, I saw my mom sitting with a pad of paper, doodling a flower, growing out of flower pot. It wasn't anything fancy or 'gallery worthy,' but it was the ease that she did it, that's what did it for me. I was hooked and I can recall trying to do the same thing. Except it didn't stop there; there was always a challenge to do what others had done and to do it my way.

Singing has to be the same; it has to be hearing or reading music others have done and being moved to the extent you express yourself. It has to be adding your own flavor, your own style to a song and hearing it expressed in your voice. It must be about rendering words, a story or feeling in a way that is uniquely your own that keeps singers singing.

Definition of His Words

His Words is about “expression.” But the title is greater than mere expression, as I have come to understand. First of all, I continue to fathom the depths of the title. It definitely feels bigger than my conscious mind can understand. Years ago I had this big idea to produce greeting cards to use as encouragement. I got the idea after I was encouraged, reading simple poems with watercolor images in a booklet. I was going through a tough time and praying and crying like crazy. But those simple words and the images lifted my spirits like nothing else!

So reflecting on that time, having begun to write a bit, I thought of what I could say to lift other’s spirits. The missing part was the images; I could not, at the time, imagine getting back to art. Well here I am; I am drawing and painting and choosing to believe the title given to me at the time, is a viable one.

His Words, for the time is about artful expression. Encouragement, hope, and making whole a world that is broken, shattered is my desire. It’s a continuous process and so is the defining of his words. Think “Blank Page” or a blank canvas. That is His Words, today.