Friday, February 3, 2012

A Life?

On Joshua Redman’s cd “Beyond,” he has a song by the above title: “A Life?” The song does not sound like a question so much as it is a statement: A Life. – please note the period.

From a pure emotional, intellectual and creative response, in my opinion, the CD is near unmatched and probably undiscovered by most people. He just happens to be one of my favorite musicians, so listening to Joshua every now and then, and this recording in particular, is a necessity. Couldn’t tell you how many times I’ve listened to this cd alone, over and over again. Especially when brooding over art in process, having a life of its own. A Life? Again, not a question but a statement.

In any given moment, quiet reflection brings me to wonder about my life. A life, my life, The Life; whatever brings me to the point of reflection. Sometimes, it’s the sheer weight of the glut of activity at any given point in my life. The twists and turns and the way life seems to fold back on itself; at any given moment, it’s a roller coaster ride where I should be familiar but in that moment I’m totally baffled by the roll and twist.

A life. Like Joshua’s quiet beginning, life has moments of quiet reflection. Sitting in the waiting room while my father is in a lab having an angiogram – which, by the way has to be making him nervous – I reflect as if I were at the center of a whirlwind, the stuff of life swirling around me, so close, that at any second, I can literally snatch a thought out of the spinning chaos, examine it, and allow it to swirl away, only to be seen again…and again…and again.

A life…calm for a moment then climbing and collapsing, spinning and near intangible in its swirl. At any moment, life happens and it needs no encouragement or judgment. It happens while we’re asleep and whether we want it to continue or not. If I decide to “check out,” call it quits, I have not stopped my presence, my life. Even after I disappear from the headlines, another victim of the circumstances of life, my life, your life,  will be examined, picked apart and dissected. Someone at some time, will look at what they determine are the facts of our life, determined to know ‘why.’ But life has more mysteries and hidden agendas than all of put together could conjure up. It is, after all, LIFE. A LIFE. A Life? a life.