Thought for The Day - The Voice on the other End

...of the Line

....the text

....the IM

....the Prayer

It's apparent our tools are useful. Our tools allow distance to be bridged with sparks and whispers of electricity. We can hear, see and as such, we remain in contact.

Goodbye can have such finality. My mom wouldn't allow us to say it when we left for the day; she told us to say "see you later." She said "goodbye" was almost a way of ensuring we would leave one another (somehow) and never see one another again. And yet, the idea isn't a bad one. The years have brought many friends into my life, mostly through Church or Work environments. And many have seemingly gone away, never to be heard from again. But others remain a phone call, text or Facebook messenger away.

Physicality and proximity...nothing like it! My daughter lives in New York, my son attends school in Missouri. And certainly we talk on the phone and through text often. We have a family chat where it's like having them sitting around the kitchen table again. But nothing is like having family, friends and close associates present and for more than a few minutes!

Thought for The Day - Playin' to The Crowd

Shaken up! 8 x 11 pencil

At some point, we all do it, we become people pleasers. No one wants to spend every second of their lives "swimming upstream." We need relationship, a sense of family and community. And yet, we are individuals, our own being with thoughts and ideas that are distinct from one another.

What we agree to be as a group or a people allows familiarity. The need for mutual agreement can seem like a force greater than the individual. But never let the crowd or community kill your individuality. Listen, first, to God as he directs your path and as necessary, follow the common consensus.

Thought for The Day - Connected

We go through life networking with people, socializing, worshipping together, but I'm sure not everyone "fits" in your life like a puzzle piece. Many people have friends they've known for years, but there are some aspects of their life that aren't shared with these friends. It isn't because they don't want to share it, it's just they haven't found a connection "open" to hearing this part of their life.

There are a few people I'm connected to. Actually a very small list of people. I have friends, acquaintances and of course family, but there are very few people who seem open to deep friendship. I share aspects of my identity, occasionally, but very rare. I will tell a friend or my wife about my hopes for the future or what I'm feeling, but it isn't the same. I've often said, I'm the listener; people come to me to be heard. The interesting thing is I think some people would consider us "perfect friends." But if they ever stopped to recall the things I've shared with them, they would find it hard to put their finger on only a few things.

Bonding, connecting, being "knit together" as it was said of David and Jonathan, is a relationship where not every fact is known, but it is a relationship where there is no fear of truth. Being connected to a person, conversations are "bi-directional," meaning both people have time to share thoughts and feelings. At least for my life, I find people are willing to pour out their soul, but rarely do the same people listen.

For me, it's a life-long concern and while I could allow disappointment to shut me down, for the time being, I continue to trudge along, ever hopeful for a person or people who understand the need for genuine connections.

Thought for The Day - Connect

After the Dance (in progress) 18 x 24 charcoal

Longing

Painful memories

Family

Community

Island

Isolation

Recluse

If your reasons for distance are a result of past hurt, and you find yourself recalling the event when someone tries to connect, consider the present moment. The person reaching out to you may not have a thing to do with the past and if this is true, also keep in mind: the past is past. It is gone and if you examine closely, you will find "this day" is nothing like yesterday. Connect, reach out, feel, be touched and caressed.

We all long for a sense of community, even if someone connects with our hurt and pain, we need someone who understands. Certainly we want someone to help us rise above ignorance and pain. We love it when a wise and compassionate person comes along who seems to love us as we are, but works toward helping us grow. They are rare, those who accept us, love us and yearn for our growth. So rare as a matter of fact that we are happy to accept the influence of people who want us to remain in our misery to support their own. But in truth, we are never satisfied with yesterday's woes; everyone is born with a desire to grow and reach new heights. And there will be times when it seems we are an island; isolated and distant from others.

It would be great, that as we grow and change, we could take those who have been in our corner, along with us. But often, their attachment to hurt and bad habits doesn't work with our new life. And like the habits we've let go to adapt new and prosperous ones, we have to let them go as well. And yet, we are always striving for relationship and community.

Thought for The Day - Thoughtful

Rise! 18 x 24 pastels

To be deep in thought or to consider; being mindful of other people or things.

Yes, there remain people like this in the world, those who consider others more than themselves. And they do so without feeling inferior. I started this blog with a friend in mind. She was going through a "rough patch" at the time and quite honestly, I didn't know it because she told me or because we discussed it. It was simply a "sense," an idea of the type of work she does. So a quick email, a few simple words to say "it will be alright" and so it began.

Every now and then, people I've connected to through social networks and those I know personally, come to mind. Some, because "distance" has dulled the connection, a simple text or call won't work. So in this place, I reach out and connect. I don't know if they will ever "see" this blog, but it doesn't matter; the word finds it's intended target one way or another. I am sure of that!

There are times I consider what should be written throughout the day; I'm always jotting "thoughts" and impressions. Sometimes those thoughts make it to this space and some don't, but I'm always mindful of the impressions of living this life. I consider the trauma, drama, highs and joys of living along this journey. If you've noticed, I include an image I've rendered and while I try to keep the words and images thematic, there are times I'm motivated to include something I don't immediately see as coupled.

It's about considering, pondering and being aware. This opportunity is about seeing the "big picture" as well as the details. You and I are intricately enmeshed in both the big picture and the "microcosmic" details.

Be.

Thought for The Day - Connected

A link, a bond formed; it happens more often than we know. People we've met, spoke to, a simple nod of "hello" and not much more. We are connected. An interesting link occurs regularly.

Visual cues, familiar sounds, a sense of touch and sense of smell runs deeper than a familiar perfume we know. You know, we are "ON" all-the-time mechanisms, designed to know, experience and communicate to one another. Our awareness is such that certain colors and patterns come to be expected in certain places. Not to mention our sense of smell; it becomes so commonplace that if we "settle" in a residence not our own, it takes a while for our noses to settle because it isn't the home we know. Personally, I can recall getting married and having to tell myself "I'm home" when I moved into our first apartment. It wasn't that I didn't want to be there - quite the contrary, it was exactly where I wanted to be. But the location where the sun came in at dawn was different, the smell of the place was foreign and I felt the difference in the wall texture.

Connected, bound to one another and things...

"merrily, merrily, merrily life is but a dream..."

Thought for The Day - Across

A Seed 8 x 11 Pastel

Took a road trip this weekend, a six hour overnight stay to Missouri to see my son. Now growing up, this was the extent of my yearly vacation trips when my parents piled up the car, visiting relatives in Kansas City, MO. But as a father of my own children, we took trips to Virginia for four years, taking my daughter back and forth to school. I fell in love with the mountains and the elevations. The roads seemed smoother - they actually are - and with the grand view as the car climbed a hill or you reached the top and looked down over the valley: SPECTACULAR! But Illinois is relatively flat and depending on what's on your mind, your thoughts become flat and monotonous as well. Missouri can be a bit scenic with it's elevations but for the most part, it's flat as well. Boring, right?

Where I am in at the moment, the life of my family and factors beyond my ability to describe, the scenery seemed exhilarating! The road is very familiar, traveled since I could remember and I could probably do it with my eyes closed. But it wasn't nostalgia, recalling road trips counting horses seen along the way. And it wasn't counting the number of signs for Merramec Caverns, either. No, it was SEEING ACROSS...

The sky, spread from where I sat, behind, before and on every side.
The lives of families and individuals in homes on the road side, connected to families, farms and apartment buildings I would never see from the roadside.
Truckers on long and short hauls, earning a living and a hundred thousand decisions made every fraction of a second.
Retired couples driving down the road, a life full of children in their rearview, parents on the other side and relatives on their road ahead.
Restaurants and diners, workers cooking, cleaning and serving hundreds in their lifetime and never realizing who they are sharing love with a plate of eggs, bacon and pancakes.
Water, mixed with concrete mix, becoming solid, hard and supporting millions of tires and lives for countless years.
Moisture, frozen and appearing white and grey and black on the road and hillside...

Across sky, land and lives, a connection exists, so integrated and complex whether one person or molecule should 'disappear,' not one second or emotion is lost. Everything remains intact no matter how many of us come and go.

We never really leave 'this place;' we are intimately connected to one another, whether we live in love or hate. For there exists a bond to all that only appears when we decide to open our eyes.

Thought for The Day - Seen and Heard

As quiet as it's kept, the above is desired by every living being.  When you are heard, it reinforces your value, you are seen as a contributor. A "Hello" is a gift; you've made a contribution in the life of another. To be seen, acknowledged, says you are part of the fabric of existence.

It's part of our bond as humans; we are connected to one another in ways we can't imagine. It's a shame evil came into the world, otherwise, the connections would be so much clearer!

To be seen and heard...all too often, the choice is to remain unseen and unacknowledged. Walk into a room full of strangers and there is acknowledgement, but not recognition, meaning no one really knows you. Walk into a room of family and friends and you are greeted, acknowledge and based on the relationship, you are valued (loved).

We are meant to connect. Social media, and media otherwise, is a way of doing that. Flaws, shortcomings and abuse? Yes, but when we come in contact with one another, there is energy, fire and an exchange.

Thought for The Day - Contemplating

I love a good story! I love when the author takes time to present at least his primary character with relationships across several layers of complexity. An example is a man who is married (relationship 1), has a best friend (relationship 2) and regularly talks with the waitress in his favorite diner (relationship 3). Actually, that isn't that complex, but the idea I'm 'trying' to get at, is our lives have multiple connections; some intersect, others seem to exist in a vacuum that are separate from everything else.

I love staring at a painting. Whether abstract, portrait or something expressionist, there is a story behind it. Oh, it may not be a story where man meets woman, falls in love and they end in divorce, but there is a story. I find myself, whether it's my work or someone else, sitting and looking for a length of time, trying to determine what direction the piece is going.

Now, even with my work, the 'path' isn't always clear. Sometimes it takes some time to determine where a piece or series is headed and where it should go. Even with portraits, I am usually inspired by a facial expression or a part of someone's body that sticks in my mind. Simply concentrating on the position of neck and shoulders, the curve as the neck connects into the shoulder...simply taking time to see the story lines running beneath that connection...

Contemplating; simply staring, wondering, imagining, surmising.