Thought for The Day - Breaking Winter

Elastic 18 x 24 pastels

Many years ago, I worked briefly with a lady who moved here from Alabama. She said to me: "you all complain about your winters here in Chicago; it gets this cold back in Birmingham!" I quickly defended "my home" and told her: "this isn't a Chicago winter! A 'normal Chicago winter doesn't have any warm days and there's always snow!" Well after nearly 30 years, it seems we may be returning to the winters I knew and tolerated/appreciated!

It's April 23rd and the high for today is expected to reach 48. I will leave the house wearing the same winter coat I've worn all winter and a knitted cap. This is a Chicago winter; one that carries well into spring. You will see people in short sleeves and shorts; personally I think they're crazy because this is the type of cold that finds a good home in your limbs and joints and long before you're old, you wish you had enough sense to dress properly and respect a "cool breeze off the lake!"

One good thing about our strange weather: it teaches you to appreciate 90 degree days, at least it taught me to do that! Another thing that occurs, you learn to make plans and as soon as the weather breaks, implement them. That's a life lesson I think I've grown into. A couple days of warm and sunny days, I'm in the yard trimming and clipping and raking. And like life, the stubborn winter winds come howling down again, just so you don't think you're in paradise! I slow my pace, put on my protective outer layer and wait for the next break.

Life has been that way for me; on my way to the life I hope for, the road can be extremely smooth. Friends and family are kind and considerate. But suddenly, out of nowhere, the road cuts off and I find myself on a detour not on the map. I spend days, weeks, months and years trying to find my way back to the path and I learn to tolerate/appreciate a few sunny days and peaceful nights. But all the while, I'm looking for the "break"; the dissolving of winter's icy grip.

Thought for The Day - Old Chicago

When my daughter was born or the winter after she was born, I remember thinking she's going to have to get used to Chicago winters. I remember wondering how she would get back and forth from school, on streets where people don't shovel their walks and would she have to walk in the streets. That first winter after she was born, we had the typical Chicago winter, except not as much snow. But it was okay; she was too small to appreciate it. That was the last winter like that.

Through the 90's and into the new millennium, winter's included periods of snow, some mild days and days when it was downright warm! I remember hardware stores begin selling plastic shovel and thinking those won't sell or people will be really disappointed when those things break! And for that 20+ year stretch, you could buy salt almost to the end of the season. But that seems to be changing now! Two weeks ago, I went to buy salt for my house and my parents and they were out of the "good stuff." Mental note: buy 600 pounds of salt next fall, while they still have the good stuff and it's cheaper!

The last few months, I don't think there's been a week that I haven't shoveled snow. I've shoveled and sweated when it 25 degrees and 5 degrees. I've bundled up, worn masks and considered layering in ways I haven't had to consider since 80's. And how is my daughter managing a Chicago winter? She moved to Newark NJ last summer!

Gotta love it!

Thought for The Day - Disillusionment and Cocoons

Fall for Francene (in progress) - 12 x 18 water color and pastel

Fall, then Winter. In the Midwest, in Chicago I have long felt like this is a period where I could curl up in a ball and disappear. Oh, I'll get out, go to work and church, run errands and work around the yard, preparing for the eventual Spring, but mentally, feels like I'm shriveling up like a leaf. Not so much depression, but as the Brazilians call it Saudade (pronounced Sa-da-gee) or "happy sadness." There is a joy in this season of bowls of homemade chili and football watched from the comfort of my kitchen television (13 inch older than my children!). When the snow fall gets to "shovel depth" - about three inches - yeah, I will dread getting out clearing my driveway and walk, my parents and the church, but it's physical labor and "in moderation," it's enjoyable. Trouble is, you can't control the weather so I might get more physical labor than I want!

There are moments, from day to day, when I could easily imagine myself in warmer climates. I'm no spring chicken and the work of getting up leaves and shoveling snow wears on you. But as I learned the other day, cutting limbs from the "junk trees" growing from my neighbors yard, take your time; the work will be completed, just not as quickly as you like. Yeah, age instructs, you don't have much time, but use it wisely.

Thought for The Day - Winter's Nap

Study for Predawn Light #3

"Working Title;" "What?!"

The blanket of snow...

It's been a while since I woke to streets and yard covered in white; air cooled and a biting breeze, coming from the west. Been a while since the cold morning seeped into my little space in the basement, the bare concrete floor radiating cold like ice. It's been a few months since I bundled up in layers of coat, sweater and a few shirts. But on some days, I'm living a perpetual Winter.

Sometimes, I simply need to lie down and take a break from the noise and confusion. I look at the stack of unfinished business, the stuff that's mine and the leftovers from others and I decide the best approach is to back away and regroup. "Give me 5 minutes!" Put my head on the desk and sleep for a bit.

You know, there are times, I'm fiercely aware this world will continue spinning quite well without me... I need my winter blanket and a few minutes sleep...