Thought for The Day - A Parent's Prayer

I didn't grow up in the worst neighborhoods or attend terrible schools. I spent the first 12 years of my life in Chicago and the remainder in the suburbs. I've been exposed to several home break-ins, had money taken when I was a child, had several fights as a child and then life settled down. I live in a small suburb of Chicago and for all practical purposes, it may as well Chicago itself. The streets can be walked, but not without concern for one's safety. So the other day, when my son sent a text to me saying people were acting crazy at school and that it was reported someone brought a knife to school, I was concerned, but not surprised. I attended the same school, watched guys and girls get in fights in the same halls he walks now. I remember seeing police outside the school and around it for scuffles. And what's sinking in at the moment: there are neighborhoods where this and worse are everyday occurrences!

My concern is for my children, where ever they are. One is on the east coast and has a daily commute on public transportation. My middle child attends school in the midwest and my concern for him is, as a young black male, he is a constant target. And my concern for my youngest is that he attends the same school I did and felt nervous about. As a parent, you want far better for your children. You want them to have opportunities you never did, to be exposed to the better things in life. But in the same breath, I realize the only way to accurately expose them is not to shelter them, but allow them to explore as their heart desires. My role is to guide, instruct, and as they get older, to encourage, console and continue to teach. And over all, to pray for their well being and safety because ultimately, I can't protect them from danger. No the one who protects them when I am far away - or near - is God. And His capability exceeds mine.

Thought for The Day - Skewed Vision

Of the Beholder 18 x 24 pastels

When my daughter went off to college, years ago, shortly before her winter break, she noticed a problem with her right eye. Initially, when she described it, I thought she may have had an infection or she kept a contact in too long and it was ripped. She said it looked like a black line running vertically along the corner of her vision. We were very concerned and wanted to put her on a plane right away! This was her first year away from us and while I was okay with that part, the "father" in me (protector, provider) wanted her back home ASAP! She assured us she was able to see well enough to complete her semester and would be home before Christmas. Hoping it was an easy fix, we took her to a specialist who told us this was a rare occurrence for a teenager and typically only occurs in the senior years. She had surgery and had to spend the majority of Christmas break lying in bed. And of course, as a parent, I thought of all the implications this injury could cause down the road. It was so bad, the doctors said if healing took longer than expected, she couldn't fly back to school. Believe me, we were in full parent mode!

It is the job of parents and "wiser adults" to guide youth. Sure teens "know more than we do," at least they like to think they do. They think we were in school when man first discovered fire, but we know we started school shortly after that! (smile) But there is a problem with trying to protect and nurture your child when you try to guide them toward "safe careers." As teens and young adults, unless we choose a career like an accountant, teacher (in some cases) or doctor, we are told to consider a different minor or, as I was told: "Plan B." I remember when this was said to me, I heard it often and begin to question my abilities and my dreams. Did I really have the skills and aptitude to be an artist? Could I compete with the other artists?

When I entered high school and college, the art teachers loved me! They loved my ability and encouraged me to expand my capabilities. But I could hear my original guides, my mom and dad saying "don't put all your eggs in one basket." What I really heard was "the world is difficult and you should choose the easiest route through life as possible." I also heard: "you're work is okay but I don't think it's good enough to compete with everyone else." Amazing how, the introduction of plan b, became my ONLY plan. Oh, I didn't roll over quite that easily, I graduated from college, B.A. of Fine Arts, but by senior year, I was sure I wouldn't be able to use my diploma as anything more than a wall hanging.

By the time my children begin to fill my days and go to school, I was entrenched up to my neck in Plan B living. As such, I was determined to allow them to bend in the direction they deemed best. I would steer, but not control. Guide, but not manipulate and force them to see life through my disappointments. It's always my hope, as they grow, that their vision remains clear and they find the guide God placed in them, guides them TRULY! Certainly, I hurt when they do, I hate it when my children are in pain of any kind, but it is far better to experience pain in your efforts to manifest the life you've always dreamed of.

Thought for The Day - The Inner Dialogue

I struggled with the title, but "id" won. :)

There is a a part of me that loves the brightness of the day and the quiet of the night. It isn't moved by the sense of right we "conscious thinkers" are troubled by. It isn't violent or prone to long dissertations about politics, race relations, and whether prayer should be allowed in schools. No, it's preference is to take in the many textures and tones around me. It loves to touch soft skin, to smell oranges and eucalyptus held by a lady on the train. There is this part of me that revels in music improvised by Robert Glasper Experiment, on the spot at a NPR Desk Jam - another smile!

But there is this other part of me that worries and frets over the appropriateness of the moment: should I be painting, considering there's a stack of laundry, books and tasks to be executed? I shouldn't spend too much time looking out the window at work; what would my bosses think? And who has time to get all this stuff done? Why isn't there more time in a day?

These parts (and so many more) serve their purpose. We are all composed of a myriad number of intersecting, intermingled and completely oppositional components. And yet, through it all, we get through the day, the week, this life. Just make sure you allow "joy" to rule the journey.

Peace
Be