Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Dreams

I’m strong, wiser, and capable of working in different disciplines. Even when I’m failing, I’m not defeated. I’m merely trying out something else until I can get to the success I desire. This is the difference of a child and an adult: a child has the unformed notion of a dream. Usually something or someone outside of them seems to be the model of that thing in them wanting to ‘be’ when they become an adult. An adult has the responsibility of putting the being into play. I am that adult, putting the dream into a working functioning human.
I remember thinking of myself as working at a table, a space by myself, sitting for hours as well as being free to get up and go as I please. I recognize at this point, the child in me likes the freedom of adulthood because the expectation is that as an adult you are free to do what you like. An adult considers the child as the one who is free to do as they please. Both are right, except being free is the hardest thing either one can do. And yet, without the strain and hard work it isn’t freedom, it’s apathy.