Thought for The Day - Rubbing the Sleep from Your Eyes

My evening routine: come in after work, grab a snack before dinner - breaking a mom's cardinal rule, except it doesn't ruin my appetite - eat dinner, fall asleep on the couch, squeeze in a little gaming, get clothes together for the next day and go to bed. Pretty much each week night, the routine is the same. Except, since 2009, when I begin painting and drawing, I've wanted the evenings to be filled with drawing and painting. Can you imagine being 'haunted' all that time with a desire that you, yourself seem incapable of fulfilling? I have my evenings, where I make it into my studio and get to the work, and there is the weekend. But I know the value of doing the work when it is begging to be done!

I would love to think last night would be a new routine, but I know my tendencies all too well! I started my normal routine, making it through dinner a nap quickly to follow, but through the process, I could see in my head the painting on the easel. I could see the colors I wanted to paint and the movement it would take. All of that hovered in my head like a pleasant reminder of the work to be done. Well I had my nap and not as long as I thought I needed. I woke with only 15 minutes rest and went to work. It was time well spent and though I expected my sense of dread for the next day to kick in, any moment, I made it through a good two hours of working.

I know exactly what I want for my life and would like to believe I am on the path to it. I will take last night and use it as a reminder of what I can do when I focus. And hopefully, I am moving down that path at a better pace. Thank you Lord!

Thought for The Day - Getting it Together

The above picture was posted to a couple of my social network sites, the other day and with the caption: "this is an empty palette; this ends tonight!" Well, in classic Eddie Hudson fashion, it didn't. I can blame a long day, my knee injury and a bunch of other factors, but the fact is it didn't end that night. Oh it came to an end, I put paint on the palette, even applied most of that paint to the current work and applied more paint, but this struggle is real, and it's with M-E!!!

But it occurs to me, while I'm not where I think I should be, it's much further than 5 years ago. Five years ago, I was in a Master's program for counseling, another one of my 'hats' I wear. I was intent on helping people by listening, glad to transition from one area to another. But there were moments when I questioned if this was the right move. Back in 1998, having begun life as a IT contractor, earning more money and now able to get into companies I only dreamed of. On my way home from work today, the idea came to mind "where do you want to be in ten years?" I said out loud: "in ten years I want to be in my studio painting!" I got excited about that idea and since ten years seemed so far away, I could push off planning for that eventual day. But the discomfort I felt in my soul for the next ten years told me, I should have been working for that day as actively as I plan out my work day.

Well it's much later than 10 years from 1998, and I'm not where I would like to be in the daily practice of rendering, but I'm so glad I responded when the time was right! And yes, slowly but surely "I'm getting it together!"