Friday, October 21, 2011
I woke to the sound of the “gong” sound coming from my clock, at 3:00 am. That’s the time to wake up during the week. I get up; have my time of writing, ala The Morning Pages exercise, shower and out the door for a couple hours of exercise. Routine; love it or leave it, the sense of knowing what your day brings contains sanity and safety. No further opinion from me.
It’s 9:05 am. Normally, after getting back from the gym, I get the wife off for work, my youngest out for school and have my devotional time. Spending time with my Father is vital for the same reasons as my 3:00 am routine: sanity and safety. The added benefit is my soul is fed in ways no other human endeavor matches. Normally, at this time, I’m sifting through emails, thinking about what I want to work on, paint or pencil wise, and planning to work until I can’t anymore. Some routines take longer to establish and I’m learning to set rules to make them happen.
For the last year or so, I’ve adjusted to life at home. For a number of years, I was a contract employee at McDonalds, testing software. At 9:05, I would have been at work for at least an hour, also sorting through email, maybe a morning conference call and by now, employees would have filtered in and gone to their desk or on their way for coffee. I would have reviewed my list of test scripts to execute for the day, checking over what was done the previous day and looking at the defect report. I could plan men’s room breaks almost to the minute, as well as when a coworker would stop by my desk for a chat. I tested software and was the resident counselor.
I know where I want to be in my life and with each day of nailing down this routine, I see myself moving toward that life. I see my days much as it is now, with the exception, rather than going to the basement, I’m in my studio, quietly preparing to open myself for creativity.
There are days when what I want feels like a 345-pound weight across my shoulders, as I try to rise from a squat, but that isn’t the case today. Today, I’m at peace with my life as it is. Yes, I would like to be “in charge,” or “responsible” for more monetary resources (meaning, “I wish I had more than enough to take care of my needs, wants and a few other folks”) but today, I’m grateful for multiple meals, a warm house and gym membership. Additionally, I have a studio in my basement, brushes, paints, pencils and paper and I can go at it as long as I desire. Course, I’m making dinner today, but that fits into the life I want.
Closing this entry with this thought: No further comment on my part needed. What about you?